A regular rodeo is bucking things and derring-do and red kerchiefs.

But a Redneck Rodeo?

The same thing with fewer pairs of pants. And more duct tape.

At least that’s Bag Lady’s working assumption. This is the first gig in Hebron, so really, who’s to say?

One thing we know: It sounds fabulous.

On the schedule at the Redneck Rodeo, which starts today: A greased pig scramble. The Cowboy Dating Game. A Daisy Duke Contest. Plus plenty of Professional Rodeo Cowboys Association action. It’s being put on by the fellow behind the Redneck Blank (formerly the Redneck Olympics) in early August. Our suggested shopping list works for both events.

Redneck is redneck, y’all.

Ready to show a little leg and sweet-talk a swine?

Saddle up!

* Aussie Outback Tassy Crusher Wallaby, Adams Horse & Pet Supplies, $44.95

BL walked into the Manchester shop: “Do you carry cowboy hats?”

Clerk: “We do now!”

Like it was fated. This hat was tan and a nice-feeling wool offering a quick-dry headband inside. But the best part? Roll over it with your horse, tractor or ATV and it pops back to shape, according to the clerk.

* Pet bandannas, Christmas Tree Shops (Augusta), $1.69 or 2/$3

Flags or flames feel mandatory. Should you be traditionally inclined, they also had the classic red print. Yes, they’re for pets, but surely Fido wouldn’t mind if you shared.

* Pink or white zebra stripe duct tape, 15 yards, Christmas Tree Shops, $2.99

A little touch of fabulous holding your shorts/cooler/tent together. And it’s made in the USA. Yee-haw!

* Foam cooler, 26-quart, Walmart, $2.28

For the basics. Feeling more than basic? Go for the Igloo Glide Roller (110-quart, $89.88) that comes with a handle, sport wheels, a fish scale and claims to be “50 percent easier to pull.”

* Hefty red drink cups, 50-pack, Christmas Tree Shops, $2.99

Yes, Solo plastic cups are classic — in fact, the Redneck Rodeo boasts a Red Solo Cup Salon (and, well, of course it does) — but these cups by Hefty offer a textured “slip resistant grip.” It’s a rodeo. Slip resistance is paramount.

* No-Ad sunscreen, 16 oz., Walmart, $8.47

Don’t succumb to an actual red neck. Choose from spfs 15, 30, 45 and 60, the latter of which has a note on the bottle reading “Not Advertised,” making it sound like Walmart and No-Ad went into the vault just to keep you extra pale. But shh.

Best find: Aussie Outback Tassy Crusher Silverton, Adams Horse & Pet Supplies, $44.99

A black cowboy hat with a pretty turquoise-stone band on the rim and you can still roll over it with your horse, tractor or ATV. Wear responsibly.

Think twice: OP board short cover-ups, Walmart, $8

The inseam was just over an inch long and shorts actually sloped up so the um, outer seam (?) was even shorter. Indeed, they had Daisy Duke Contest written all over them, but Daisy Don’t.

* Adams and CTS prices are as of the week of 6/22.

Bag Lady’s true identity is protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (always pantsless) and the Customer Service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach her at [email protected].